An Actress's Take on All-Things-Screen

The Meg


The Meg has got mixed reactions from my friends. No thanks – is one. That’ll scare me to death – another. But I’m a firm believer of don’t knock something until you’ve tried it. So, for anyone who likes a good little underwater thrill from the safety of a plush cinema seat, this movie’s your guy. Or rather, girl. Despite the film not being about a teenager called Megan – it IS about a prehistoric giant shark called The Megalodon – for short, The Meg – so you’re on the right track.


Jason Statham stars as Jonas – a man (I’m still not quite sure of his job role) helping a team of marine biologists to take down this Jaws-looking creature. It’s actually Jaws on steroids. And Statham’s character is right there with it – jumping in the water alongside the beast, trying to tackle it with just a wetsuit for protection. Because that’s what his character does. He saves the day, he wins the affections of the girl and he smoulders at the camera whilst panicking about a rescue-mission-gone-wrong past. But let’s rewind for a second – the aforementioned ‘girl’ is a strong woman who doesn’t need Jonas’s I-want-to-show-off-to-everyone attitude. She jumps in right alongside him. She has her own agenda. So do the rest of the crew who each offer their own little quirks (and meltdowns about the monster who is a-knocking).


I couldn’t tell if the film was aware of its ridiculousness or not. At points it was – the young girl laughs Jonas off as ‘crazy’, the tech guy asks the biologists why they hadn’t prepared themselves more by watching ‘Shark Week’ on the television. And at other times, Statham’s lines were too cringey, the storyline completely implausible and the fact that China’s (epic) funding of the actual film was as subtle as Megan’s The Meg’s pearly whites.


But hold up – I know, I know. You’ve got to take this film for what it is. It’s silly, it’s ridiculous. And I enjoyed it massively. Also – Jason Statham is incredibly likeable in the film (and, for the first time in my life I’ve realised – VERY attractive). Don’t just take my word for it either. The people sitting next to me (all over the age of 60, I might add – not the target demographic I would imagine) came out saying they thought it was ‘brilliant’. And why shouldn’t it be? If all we did was make I-need-to-create-an-oscar-winner, then the world would be a very samey place. You’ve got to have differences, you’ve got to have underwater films. And a giant bloodthirsty shark called Megan is the answer to all of this.


What I will say however is that if you have a fear of sharks, this film certainly isn’t going to help. I won’t be going anywhere near the water soon, that’s for sure. Hey – maybe the film’s actually quite educational. Maybe we really should be wary of what lies beneath.


Maybe I’m reading too much into it.




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